yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
Randomize
