his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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