I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
