Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
drinking out of a sandbucket again
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
