you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
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