I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
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