apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
