you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
where are my pants?
in the oven.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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