so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
Randomize