He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Randomize
