bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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