i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
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