Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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