when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
Randomize
