He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize