NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
I think you'll appreciate my way of waking up today: Under my cubicle, boxed in by boxes of printer paper, and hung over. I don't even know how the fuck I got in here in the middle of the night. I went to my car and fell back asleep. I'm now 2 1/2 hours late.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
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