well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Randomize
