2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
I FOUND THE LEGS
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
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