Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
Woke up to a bottle of gatorade and a packet of saltine crackers tied to underwear hanging from my ceiling fan, along with 3 advil stuck to a piece of duct tape and a note saying "have a happy hangover- <3 you/me"
Drunk you is pretty stunner.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Randomize