so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
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