I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
This is my gift to your gina
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
