there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Randomize