Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
