dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Randomize
