i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
Randomize
