I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
