We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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