We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize