It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
Randomize
