what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
Randomize