At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
I wish you could order shots online.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
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