absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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