Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
