This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
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