with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
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