I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
Randomize
