Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
