I puked a lego.
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Randomize
