I'm eating all of the evidence.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
Randomize
