She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
Randomize
