Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
He left a cum stain in the shape of a heart on my sheets.
He's like the Bob Ross of love stains.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Randomize