oh god the rape fog is back!
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
You made out with two different species that night
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize
