So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
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