More tranny stories later!
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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