I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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