My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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