I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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