Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Randomize
