He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
Randomize
