he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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