38 yer olds are good kisserssss
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
