just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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