is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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